1. Drink more water.
  2. Make stronger effort to take out the compost before third overflow bowl is necessary.
  3. Find tote bag large enough to smuggle the really big bag of Little Lad’s Herbal Corn into movie theater.
  4. Redeem self after “seared” tuna incident.
  5. Achieve automation with popovers. Like, going into oven while coffee brews automation.
  6. Memorize Food Network daytime schedule in order to plan strategic hanging out with grandma time. Aim for Paula Deen; avoid Rachel Ray.
  7. Continue to liberate phyto-brothers and sisters from the tyranny of corporate quality standards.
  8. Experiment with nettles.
  9. Buy second suction-cup soap dish shelf to put wine glass on in the shower.
  10. Also use it for coffee mug.
  11. Arrive home to aproned boyfriend just putting dinner on the table.
  12. Don’t kill this year’s potted herbs.
  13. Contribute to chocolate drawer (labeled “Emergency Teacher Supplies”) at work.
  14. Get carrot tattoo.
  15. Rediscover version of self that makes it to the farmer’s market every week. Recruit absurdly pastoral harvest basket if necessary.

14a. Get knives sharpened.

14b. Keep all fingers.

  1. Finally make that tequila and rosé cocktail.
  2. Investigate reports that kohlrabi is worth the time.
  3. Host more tea parties.
  4. Muster nerve to make complicated, multi-gnash chocolate peanut butter cake for sister’s birthday.
  5. Procure at least one plate large enough to wear the title of “dinner” without irony.
  6. Make an honest woman out of ginger.
  7. Find use for leftover jar of pickled cherry brine in back of fridge.
  8. Identify grains on shelf of unlabeled bulk bags with slightly less than a serving left in them.
  9. Stop pretending that anyone likes pumpkin butter.
  10. Continue to eat popcorn for dinner when no one else is home.
  11. Drink more water.